Forever & Always: The Ever Trilogy (Book 1) by Jasinda Wilder

Author:Jasinda Wilder [Wilder, Jasinda]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781941098011
Amazon: 1941098010
Publisher: Seth Clarke
Published: 2013-12-18T00:00:00+00:00

Cade,

I’m so sorry about your dad. I can’t even begin to put into words how sad I am for you. You’ve lost so much in your life. No one should have to go through what you have. I actually put that letter in my purse to read later and then got sidetracked and forgot. That’s a shitty explanation, I know. I’m sorry. I treasure your letters, too. I really do. I cried so hard when I read that letter.

I know my letter about Billy must’ve seemed especially inconsiderate and self-centered in light of that. I won’t write about him anymore.

Regarding your feelings for me, god, that really complicates things. I felt the same way. You were so different from everyone I’d ever met, ever seen. You’re handsome, but that’s not the right word. It’s not enough. You’re…god, “rugged” is the only word I can think of. Is that stupid? It’s better than cute, which just doesn’t apply, in a good sort of way. And I really did have a crush on you. When you came out to the dock right at the end of camp, the way you put your arms around me and just held me, I’ve never felt so comforted in all my life. I know I said I wouldn’t talk about Will, but he’s a part of this discussion. He and I are dating. It’s just a fact. But then I have this relationship with you. I feel like I know you, like we’re connected in some way, like our souls are cut from the same cloth. Does that make sense? So it almost feels like cheating to have this with you, but it’s not. We’re pen pals. Maybe that’s all we’ll ever be. I don’t know. If we met IRL (in real life, in case you’re not familiar with the term) what would happen? What would we be? And just FYI, the term you used, a literary love? It was beautiful. So beautiful. That term means something, between us now. We are literary loves. Lovers? I do love you, in some strange way. Knowing about you, in these letters, knowing your hurt and your joys, it means something so important to me that I just can’t describe. If that’s unfair or unfaithful to Will, I don’t care. Maybe that’s horrible of me, but it’s the truth, and it’s a truth only you know. There are things, if I’m being honest, that only you know. Like for instance, I’ve never told anyone, ever, how I feel about Eden. How I love her with all my heart and soul and could never live without her, but sometimes just…just can’t stand her. Hate her. She’s so impossible sometimes. No one knows that but you. No one knows how mixed up I am about Will, either, except you, and to some degree him. No one knows how fucked up I am about missing Mom. How all my art is an attempt to find her inside me, to feel like I’ve found her.

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